In no universe should it take any living thing five hours to figure out that Evan Rachel Wood is the absolute worst. Mildred didn’t say, “To hell with her,” until minute 300, but it’s a sentiment I’ve had since seeing Thirteen eight years ago.
Before watching the miniseries, I read an interview with Todd Haynes (whom I respect and love) in which he defended its length, but I’m having a lot of trouble understanding why the plodding pace was necessary. For such a long story with such a detestable villain, Mildred Pierce certainly ended with a whimper.
2009 Kate Winslet on Nude Scenes
“I think I won’t do it again: a) I can’t keep getting away with it, and b) I don’t want to become ‘that actress who always gets her kit off, ‘” Winslet told Time magazine.
The second hour of Mildred Pierce was subtitled, “The hour during which Mildred gets her kit off,” by the way. But good on her for keeping it on for two years.
So how much of Mildred Pierce do I have to read before Sunday?
Will HBO and Todd Haynes be providing page numbers for each part? Also, I’m beyond irritated that it will now be impossible for me to read the novel without envisioning the daughter as Evan Rachel Wood. The less space she takes up in my brain, the better it is for everyone. Because the more I think of her, the more I complain about her - and you don’t want to be around me when I’m complaining about Evan Rachel Wood, James Franco, James Franco, or James Franco.