- Roommate 1: I got home and [Roommate 2] was making Brussels sprouts.
- Roommate 2: SORRY. I CAN'T COOK.
- Roommate 1: And she was adding spices to them. Cinnamon and nutmeg and paprika.
- Roommate 2: I DIDN'T KNOW. I CAN'T COOK.
- Roommate 1: They smelled like oatmeal.
- Me: Did you eat them?
- Roommate 2: Half.
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