“A soft, cool rain begins to fall. “She’s the one,” you hear someone whisper before you ascend to a plane of existence where human vocalizations no longer mean anything to you. “The one who drinks a lot of water.””—So You’ve Decided to Drink More Water | The Hairpin
This is me being really nervous as a guest on Tara, Dave, and Joe’s Extra Hot Great podcast. We talked about Our Idiot Brother and The Golden Girls. Listen to them being Extra Hot Great, and listen to me being Extra Hot I Keep Repeating Myself and Clicking My Pen.
I can hear someone in the office discussing the plot of that underrated (or was it justifiably forgotten?) Michael J Fox movie "The Secret of My Success."
They’re asking, “What was the name of that movie? You know? He was in the mailroom and then he worked his way up to the top? But he lied about it?”
No one has a clue and it’s taking every ounce of my self control to not scream “THE SECRET OF MY SUCCESS THE SECRET OF MY SUCCESS THE SECRET OF MY SUCCESS IT’S AVAILABLE TO WATCH ON NETFLIX INSTANT BY THE WAY AND IT’S CALLED THE SECRET OF MY SUCESS ALSO ON THE POSTER THEY SPELLED IT WITH DOLLAR SIGNS SO IT’S THE SECRET OF MY SUCE$$.”
I just called my mom to give her some heartbreaking news.
"Hey Mom. I don’t know how to tell you this, and it really hurts to do it over the phone, but I just have to let it out. Tyler, the Creator’s mom is my mom now. I hope you understand. No, please. Mom. Stop. Don’t say anything. It’s best if I just hang up now. You’ve been really great, but I have to move on. Bye.”
“According to the Atlantic Oceanographic and Meteorological Laboratory at the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, taping windows “is a waste of effort, time and tape.” The site adds: “It offers little strength to the glass and NO protection against flying debris. After the storm passes, you will spend many a hot summer afternoon trying to scrape the old, baked-on tape off your windows (assuming they weren’t shattered).””—